Don't Be So Hard on Yourself

“Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

I rather give up my first born child than talk in clichés, but guess what? The clichés are true! (stab me.)

Ever since I found out that I wanted to be a glamorous soccer dad/trophy husband, eons ago. I have not been very kind to myself. I learned to give 110% to everything I do, including being petty. Which means I would always be exhausted. In high school I took mostly AP classes, I had a part time job, and I was in the swim team. Then after graduation I’d invest all of my time in jobs where I thought I could have a career. I went to school full time and worked full time in a job where it was very demanding. So what was the outcome of all of that? I burned out, I would fall into small depression periods, ugh. It was not pretty. I mean I am pretty, but not the situation. Sorry, my inner millennial did not want me to let you think I was not handsome.

After failing at everything do to the burn out, I would kick myself for not handling it. That thought process really did a number on me. I did not feel proud of myself, I felt like I was not good enough, that I should have worked even harder. I was so hard on myself I ended up in therapy. I’m very happy that I did get helped, because I saw all the damage that I was doing. At first I felt resentment for allowing myself to get sucked into the hustle, because I felt I did not enjoy anything in my life because I was always on the go. But that resentment is bad as well, so I had to learn to appreciate all of the work that I did. All of that work guided me to where I am now. And I am not mad about that. So I learned a very valuable lesson. That lesson is to pace myself in whatever project I get involved. If it is losing weight and get healthy, to start small and work myself up. And if I do end up on a Friday night putting egg rolls as toppings on my XL pizza, and I finish it all, to not feel guilty, and start again the next day.