I'm A Mess, Shocker
I have a problem with making decisions. Maybe it comes down to the fear of not working out and being held accountable. I hate making small choices, can you imagine how paralyzed I feel trying to make a life decision? I don’t know how to handle my situation. All my life I have been groomed to become a person with a successful career in law, medicine, or finance. That is all that I have learned to do, and knowing that it is harmful to not have a voice, I started to unlearn what I know. I have been in and out of jobs, same with school.
I know it sounds very dramatic when I say a life decision, but that is how I see it. I imagined myself doing something, and then now I have to make a decision. When I make this decision I lose the possibility of what I didn’t choose! Yeah, It sounds crazy. So now I am in avoiding making it. I am torn between three situations that have great pros and very drastic cons.
There is a job offer in my home town, not very well paid but I do get my freedom to be. There is an opportunity to take a job with my dad and it is very well paid, but that means I travel a lot with him and won’t be able to go to school and it will delay me being the fabulous creative director for Sephora that I was meant to be. The last option is a pill that is really hard to swallow. That is a full time school schedule, part time minimum wage, and living at home for roughly 3 years. I am literally down to looking at it as which one is the lesser of 2 evils, 3 in this situation.
I have made list of all the benefits and downsides to weigh in the choices. I have noticed a small pattern in what I truly value, so there is something I should keep looking into. Luckily I can write for y’all from anywhere.
i'm so glad I asked you for the link to your blog. this entry was...too relatable. I was raised the same way and right now i'm stuck with a major that I thought was the one but might not be and just a whole mess. i hope when you make your decision, you make it for you, not anyone else. life is too short to not do what you love! when the time comes, you'll know in your heart what you want to do. good luck love and i look forward to reading more from you!! -your topgolf bayhost :]
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