I Don't Want to Wait

Hmmmm this quarantine has been hitting differently. Yes, there is danger outside our front doors, but we are participating to minimize the impact of this virus. So while we wait for this to be over, why wait to resume our journey? When we can take action towards goals and projects. I am tired of waiting. I have been waiting most of my conscience life. I have been waiting to get slimmer, waiting to get successful, waiting for things to blow over, and when I feel I get a break, I feel like I am falling behind on everything. For years I have lived in the future or in the past. My presence was hardly in the present. I would revisit situations that were already in my rear view mirror. I would create future scenarios or predicted situations that were irrational, sending me into an anxious state. This habit would send me on painful spirals. 

I am so lucky that with help I have been able to pull myself into the present. Sometimes easier than other times, but I still manage to do so. Today I continue to feel like a pop star, because I allow myself to be pop star. I would not let myself to be happy until I had what I was fighting for. I would always feel like a work in process. But not anymore, now I truly do feel like I am living. Sure, I haven’t finish school yet, or become Taylor Swift’s friend, but I am working on it, and at the same time I am enjoying every sip of coffee I have. I enjoy the warm sun on my face. I enjoy being in my skin. We truly can end some waits.

This quarantine see what I see, an opportunity to take a breath and feel Mother Nature holding you up and cosmic energy keeping your heart beating.